In Celebration of Marriage

That diamond ring is a precious thing,
and we never want to lose it.
It's like the words to a song that we love to sing,
every time we hear the music.
It's like a rainy night in candlelight,
And oh it's so romantic!
We got the whole thing working out so right,
And it's just the way we planned it.

We're in this love together. We got the kind that lasts forever.
And like berries on the vine, it gets sweeter all the time!

--Al Jareau, "We're in This Love Together"

This has been a monumental week for marriage, especially my marriage, which turns 30 years old on July 2, 2013. The song quoted above was played for our first dance, and aside from actually losing my diamond ring (and then finding it a few months later and then losing it again, possibly permanently now :( , we have been blessed to have that kind of marriage and then some.

We met when I was eighteen, and within a few months, I had decided Bob was the one for me. I think it took him a bit longer to come around (he had been engaged previously, and was still reeling from The Breakup). but from my point of view, he was cute and kind, his family was nice, and we had a lot of fun together.  That is one of the great benefits of marrying young --- you don't over think all those things like money, careers, children, what does this mean for our taxes, etc. You just decide you're going to make it work and you assume it's possible to do that. Bob never officially proposed but when I was 20, during my sophomore year in college, we were shopping for china for one of his cousin's weddings and he saw a pattern he liked - Noritake's "Limerick". It was on sale and he suggested we buy 12 place settings on credit and take turns making the monthly payments. Hmmmm. Sounded like a partnership and a commitment to me! I agreed immediately! We bought the china and ended up getting married two years later, about three weeks after we'd made the last payment. I still have every piece, and we use it as often as I can make an excuse to pull it out off the cabinet.

I was a little lost planning the wedding, since my mom had died a couple years before, I was still in college, and my sisters lived far away and were busy with their own lives.  Juggling final exams and wedding invitations, making catering and facilities arrangements, and planning the wedding ceremony all by myself was really hectic. Our wedding date was only two weeks after my graduation, and I needed to also move out of my college apartment, find a new place to live, and move our stuff into that place, all between the date of graduation and the wedding.  Oh and one other thing, neither of us had a job!  That is the benefit of being madly in love-- you just don't stress over little things like that.  Our parents, on the other hand, stressed ALOT.  My dad, brother, and sister tried to convince me to wait, while Bob's dad had a friendly chat with us, which started out with, "Well kids, you know you can't live on love alone."  Really? We seemed to somehow find a way to do just that, scraping by with our little savings account and living off all the thousands of bags of rice our friends had poured into every nook and cranny of our new apartment while we were on our honeymoon. I found remnants of that rice for years!. And boy did that rice look nice served up in our beautiful new china!

Even today I remember each line of our wedding vows, and I am so deeply honored to have married my best friend and a man who takes those words as seriously as I do, promising each other 

To have and to hold
For better or for worse
In good times and bad
In sickness and in health
For richer and for poorer
To love and to cherish
Forsaking all others
Until death do we part.

Love you Bob and sorry it's taken over a year to finish writing this post!

Response from my sister Claire:

On Aug 13, 2014, at 8:11 PM, "minimunchkyn@comcast.net" <minimunchkyn@comcast.net> wrote:

Really liked your marriage post. I celebrate marriage too...even though at times....never mind!

You really are a glutton (gluten!) for punishment planning the wedding so close to your graduation, etc. but I knew you would pull it off.

I think back to your wedding and the Crow Canyon reception once in a while: Rick trying to keep Briana happy during the wedding where the whole wedding party could see him struggling in the cry room, your wedding party laughing at jokes during the wedding, me forgetting my camera in my car at the church and realizing it when we arrived at the reception, Briana sleeping soundly on a blanket in the corner during the reception with a vibrating floor and music off the charts, Jack getting drunk on Gimlets, Aunt Amelia (and Aunt Ann I think) watching Briana while Rick and I danced. And also I remember the get together at Aunt Jackie's house. Oh and also Rick, Briana and I flying up with Dad in his plane. Rick looking white as a ghost whispering to me during a dip during turbulence when the plane dropped..."Is is supposed to do that???"

Fun times!

Claire